Cute Caed Quote Catch-up

About 6 weeks ago I started jotting down all the funny thing our 3.5 year old says. Now I understand lots of these things are funny only to me, or in context, or perhaps paired with the hilarious body movements and voice of only Caedmon himself. But nevertheless I am sure the grandma's will like to read through :) And kudos to whoever makes it all the way through - there are lots! Also note he says a lot of stuff that I would never want to write down let alone admit (i.e "I will never play with you again, You are NOT my friend, I will NOT do that) - but I think I will choose to remember the cute and funny.

Cats hiss when they are mad and I yell when I'm mad.

(While reading with dad this am) 'that is where you pause when you are reading (points to comma) and that is where you stop (points to period), I learned that from storybook factory'

It's the betterest thing I ever have to tell you

You can't lay with me because I'm fragile - (pronounced fra gyle) 

Don't worry these faries will bretect you. (Protect)

(Of my gum)- It's color is white with squiggily wiggly scragles (the lines in the gum) and blue dots

I like that girl the best. (Me- which part of her do you like the best?) I like all of her parts the best- (of the lady with white hair from incredibles)

(While playing super Heros with daddy) I'm gonna stuck your mouth with stucks, I'm gonna whiz by!

When my head gets wet I'll just wag it like this (shakes head)

If you don't find it you will get distinated (what does that mean caed) get in trouble (oh you mean disciplined?)

That boy was awfully mean

Something electricated me (shocked)

I don't want that ABC couscous touching my noodles (ABC pasta touching shell noodles)

I'm not xiaode I'm dade (after someone called him Xiao Peng you - maybe you need to know Chinese to get this one)

I'm going to play with some people that are short like me (other kids)

There was a girl at school who really loved me because she was nice to me. She had green clothes with black dots

Are your colleagues coming over too?

I don't like groceries in January.

Daddy you wear sandales because it's awfully sunny outside

I pray for unc c to be safe in his plane and his loop-de-loops and circles and roundy-rounds

(Caed came out of his room with no shirt, sean asked what happend c said) I took it off to see how long my arms are (Then later-) my arms are long to do karate

God thank you for godly spouses and curtains

  

Mommy what is that sound? (It's the people upstairs caed.) Is it Chinese people or English people or Spanish people or French people? (Um Chinese people son, always Chinese people.)

It's only one mommy, chill out

(Of unc c flying planes to secret places) - is there jewels there? Monsters?

Mommy do I have a beard yet? (Not yet.) Oh but I have a little bit of hair coming out

This one is nerbous (nervous of his dinos)

Little children dont have neck meats (after we told him we wanted to eat his neck meats)

See daddy it worked out fine that time

(While playing pooh and piglet - pooh do you have to go pee?) "yeah but stay right there my penis is fragile and it needs privacy"

After I gave him his blaster rocket pack. Oh can you make me knee lasars and hand lasars to go with it?

After this year is it going to be brilliant?

(In the am, caed let's pray) 'i already prayed to god in my window that the sun would dry up the puddles so I can bring my blasters out'

If I have just undies on that makes me famous

Don't bug me with your birdulation. (What's a birdulation caed?) It's when some one bugs you

What's with all that rubble over there? (Points to pile of bricks)

(On dec 7)- are we having a party today. (No.) Ugh my birthday is taking a long time.

How do you say calandar in Chinese? (Rili.) Um that sounds French

(At homeschool pretending to be secret spy daisy. Obey or your consequence is a spanking.) Mom spies don't get spankings

What kind of shirt did I wear in your tummy? (You were naked.) Oh could I see my penis?

I'm going green ninja poop. That is how ninjas poop

I dreamed I found a bird and daddy told me not to put it in the nest but I did then daddy spanked my knee and I started ti cry and so did daddy and it rained on the bird and the nest fell down. That's my Christmas dream.

This is a libribox recording. All libribox recordings are in polly mushings (are in the public domain, this is the intro to all his audio books)

While half asleep on seans shoulder, "keep your eyes peeled for toys r us daddy"

Down down do you bag do you bag do you bag (cleavland shuffle). (What's that from caed?) From unc c's party, at the beach. Remember I wanted those little sanals on the table.  

Why did Colby not want to share those binoculors with me at camping (4 months later when he saw some binoculars)

Why do girls have pajinas to push out babies? (After going to bathroom)

Mommy I want to marry you

I spy a cat with a littleboy icecream maker giving a present (see picture)

(You know your not supposed to be crazy so why did you say that?) "I just don't know about such things"

Mommy the horse sounds like your name, Ma. Ah the lion is shizi like my shizi (pointer finger). While flipping through Chinese animal flash cards. But that is not called wu GUI she said it's called hai GUI (of the turtle, again knowledge of Chinese required)

I'm mad at you daddy about having a girl cousin because it doesn't match. I'm just a little bit excited I'm going to have a girl cousin but I only like matching. 

Can someone else move in our old house and we move into this hotel?

Daddy please don't smoke in here (while holding up no smoking sign to Sean, who has never smoked, in hotel room)

Your breaking my real holy spirit by moving this front room around. 

God help me to come to know you in a real personal way thank you for making me pretty like Mary. And I hope you can come over to my house amen.

I ibented my latest ibention yet, battle balls. (invented)

No I want the whole piece of you to come with me

My snake penis is very strange, it has lines all around it (while pretending to be snakes)

I am going to brush your hair so pretty mommy with this spiky battle blaster. And your hair will help it fight the monkeys

I was sad when daddy washed me (pause) sometimes big boys do cry

(Caed close your eyes do you can sleep.) But it's hurtful to close my eyes so it makes me not with comforting.

I had a dream I was eating a donut then we discovered it had poop on it.

Mommy your hair looks pretty nice

Girls lick boys sometimes at school (what????)

Don't curl me up like that

(I'm sad you hit that girl at school) 'cheer up mommy it's happy new year'

There is no math circus in our city, it's just in the movie. Sometimes you want to be in movies

Mommy my tummy feels like um someone has to lay with me (at bed time)

Oh no I got mud on this spot of my glorious pants! (Where did you learn that word from?) I will never tell you. Okay I'll tell you that word is from very hairy monster (iBook.) Oh my glorious pants

Mommy you don't know about such things.

She's dressed just like Santa! (Of village bride who was wearing a red coat)

I'm gonna make a gentlemen thing inside here (while unrolling paper towels)

When I'm talking and the weather feels cold, air comes out of my mouth